#negative framing

[graaaaceeliz]

You know what I love? Positive permanent framing.

You will grow. There will be joy. The sun will always shine again and the rain will always fall again. We are people and people are all capable of happiness, and you will go out and find it.

The framing of these concepts is positive, and more permanent than "you could find joy" "you can grow". It's all in the modal verbs.

However, I feel like I see a lot of permanent negative framing too.

You will learn to hate your body. You will be depressed and it will feel like the end of the world ((note: this statement MAY be true BUT it is important that it continues with a positive. This paragraph is about statements which are not balanced by a positive frame, and not targeted as "I understand your pain".))

I will learn to hate my body - why? Why must I? Must we tell our children that "Regardless of my encouragement, the world will make you hate yourself, because it hates you because you are hateable. And that's bad, but tough, because that's who you are."

Terrible. I do not feel encouraged. I feel insulted and upset and hopeless. If I EVER frame something like this to the children I teach, shoot me.

"Regardless of my encouragement, don't let the world make you hate yourself, whatever it says, because some people want you to be hateable, and they will hate you, and that's not your fault, and it might hurt, but it's okay, because that's not all of who you are."

I talk to my kids about how they frame their thoughts a lot, because it's easy to become stuck in negative framing (thanks, depression) which takes a lot of work to remove (and I am so thankful I have put in that effort and am still putting it in) and which will destroy a person's hope, happiness and esteem. Just think about this classic example:

I can't do it -> I can't do that yet

Or

I can't do it so it's pointless -> I am going to really, properly try and the trying is enough

Can you see why I think it's so important to have positive framing in not just our words but in how we actually think? Next time you see something which discusses negative emotions, spare a moment to re frame it if you can, and take away a positive emotion.

I hate my body, only sometimes, but mostly my body is here as part of me, and sometimes I hate Me too, but I won't hate me always, because I am trying, goddammit, and that's enough.

You ARE (k)enough.

[pawzofchaos]

whoooo this turned our better than I had meant for it to @meandtheyeehaws

congrats on 30k!! 🎉 Little dtiys for the who framed fizzarolli au ^^

[windwenn]

“Oh, my love, don’t forsake me

Take what the water gave me”

[late-draft]

Just sharing some process and colour experiments.

[miracle-negative]

"Day4 - Frame"

INKINKINK

[stuck-in-jelly]

Cant stop thinking about how apparently Season 7 is going to be Ezran’s season and the slow and steady build up to a breaking point for him.

Ezran is in a weird delicate balance, walking across the tightrope of being a child and being a king. We see both sides equally, we see Ezran’s barely clinging childlike mannerisms and we also see him command and lead both with love and with force.

And he is equally regarded in this manner by the people around him, some addressing him more as a child then king and others more king then child.

“Who is this child?” “Such childish dreams.” “You deserve time to do kid things” “the whining child king.” vs “He is a King!” “Because you know-you’re the King.” “That is what King Ezran decided.” “I serve the true King.”

That is already a lot to try and balance, his wants versus his duty as a king but now that balance is being tested.

The weight of everything is starting to crash down. His stressful rule as a king in a time of insurrection and war, his own people pushing back against his ideals and attempts at progress, his citizens and home decimated by a dragon, his father’s murderer being freed by his own brother, and now the releasing of an ancient evil.

No one told him his father was dead, too worried to tell a child horrible news, and no one had told him the plan to bring Runaan back, hardly giving him a second thought.

The more I think about it the more my brain drifts to this section from the season 2 novelization:

“No. No, no no!!” Ezran shouted. He didn’t care if he sounded like a two-year old.

“Ezran. It’s going to be okay,” Rayla started to say.

That was about the dumbest thing anyone could possibly say, Ezran thought. Nothing was ever going to be okay again.

Just the moment Ezran fully reverts to being a small kid again, when he stops caring that he is acting like a child because he is a child because he is mad because its all hitting him at once and it isn’t fair.

I want to see how he takes it all

[tehawesomestkitteh]

how i honestly thought the encounter with that moth in tpoh was going to go

[ailendolin]

BBC Ghosts Ask Game

Since Ghosts started five years ago today, I thought I'd create a little ask game to celebrate five years of happy haunting! 👻

Who are your 3 favourite main ghosts?

Who are your 3 favourite minor ghosts (including the Plaguers)?

Who is your favourite living character (apart from the Coopers)?

What is your favourite thing about Mike and Alison's relationship?

What are your 3 favourite dynamics in the show?

What is your favourite moment from each series?

What is your favourite Christmas Special?

What lines never fail to make you laugh?

What are the 3 most touching scenes for you?

What would have been your perfect ending?

What is your favourite thing about the show in general?

Is there a flashback scene you wish we'd gotten?

What storyline(s) would you have liked to see (more) explored?

What is your favourite part of Button House / West Horsley Place?

What is your favourite chapter of the Button House Archives?

[thefriendoforatioisdead]

THE LITTLE HEAD SCRATCH KIM GIVES WAN !!!!

EXCUSE ME ????

[columboscreens]

My favorite genre of Columbo murderer is the one that hangs around and annoys Columbo the whole episode and is utterly surprised when they gets caught.

i would argue that the ones who hang around with him the most actually tend to be the least surprised when finally caught. carsini, brown, and rumford, arguably three of the most in-love-with-columbo murderers of the series, never object to hanging out with him, and they're all totally stoic and almost expecting their arrest when he finally nails them. they've all realized exactly how smart and dedicated he is in his pursuit. in fact, they have another thing in common at the episode's denouement--all of them were dying to confess the entire time, and when they do, it is with such stunning amounts of adoration, reverence, and grace that it waxes weirdly poetic

Loving Killer's Quatrain how i so longed to confess my misdeeds that i'm relieved this charade can now cease for as your shackles chain my trembling wrist by you alone i now ache to be kissed

the ones who are most surprised are the ones who want to fucking push him down the stairs. galesko, kingston, hanlon--they're the ones who want nothing more than to beat columbo's head in, and they're the ones who are most blown away by their defeat because they were so busy daydreaming about shoving him into oncoming traffic that they never stopped to appreciate his intellect.

:o huh

[ohmigoshiloveu]

Okay so like. I still haven't managed to get myself to finish episode 9, so I don't fully know how Theo's glow up finishes, but regardless I fucking love relistening to Emizel's section of episode 1 and like. Fuck man Theo does a lot of growing. Like he's a little bit pathetic at the beginning of the series. He's so, so brave during the alleyway fight, but he sounds shaky and scared and like a sopping wet pathetic baby the entire time. Charlie specifically describes him as not very alert, not a great fighter, and gives him this little moment where it takes him a second to manage to crush a soda can. He botches the check to beat Emizel in Smash Bros so there's a chance he sucks at the related skills (dexterity and computers I think?), but also after he loses Charlie specifically has him sound super frustrated and conclude that he should've 'stayed in his lane'. When Emizel says 'We'll do what we do best,' and Theo immediately responds with 'drink soda?' so fast that the other players notice it. Charlie might've had that as a predetermined character thing. Theo drinks soda. There's not much else to him.

Which creates this interesting dynamic between him and Emizel, because Emizel is so much better at him at all of these skills that the people around them (a FUCKING GANG) value. Emizel's perceptive, and agile, and strong, and a great fucking fighter irl and in videogames AND he always sounds badass. He's the top dog, the apex predator in their social circle. And I think that colors their relationship a lot? Like Theo has to look up to Emizel. I bet that Theo's looked up to Emizel since they first met, maybe Emizel came crashing into his life doing something epic and Theo thought it was the greatest shit ever.

On the flip side, I was getting a few hints of resentment? Hear me out! It's that 'should have just stayed in my lane' line. He's painfully aware how great Emizel is, compared to how much he's (from his perspective!) just a one trick pony. He's here to drink soda and say funny things, that's all most people want from him and he fucks up whenever he tries to do anything else!

And later in the segment Theo snarkily brings up a medicine check that Emizel had just fucked up in like this super backhanded, super passive aggressive way. That could be him wanting to rub Emizel's one singular fuck up in his face (especially because Theo was having a Moment about how he feels like people only see him as the soda guy, so any feelings of inadequacy would've been dialed up to eleven, so if there was any time for him to resent Emizel it'd be then), but it could also be that he was frustrated with Emizel being an ass (Emizel had just guessed that Theo's dream was to be a nurse, which was flat out wrong, and that's literally what set up the backhanded comment. Theo was saying something like 'thank fuck you don't wanna be a nurse cuz you sure fucked up with nursing that guy earlier.' It could also be that Emizel literally almost forgot Theo's name. Theo literally gave him the 'th' sound, it might've just been a bit Charlie was doing or it could've been Theo being AWARE that Emizel almost forgot his name. Or! It could be that in this moment, where Theo was confiding in Emizel about feeling like being the soda guy was all anyone ever saw in him, Emizel said something to the affect of 'well yeah Soda's the fun one.' Emizel doesn't think before he speaks and literally has a 1 in empathy. Just because he loves Theo doesn't mean he's not gonna blunder into being a complete and utter asshole to him. I'd hazard to say Emizel accidentally being an ass to people he cares about is a running theme).

But also all of that might come down to Charlie still getting the character down. Or, because I've theorized before that Theo might not've been supposed to survive the first Gabriel fight, the little hints of bitterness might've been intentional (even if they were completely improvved and Charlie didn't mean to add that to Theo's character) because Charlie was trying to shove as much character into this character before he was gone, but once it became clear that Theo was going to stick around longer he dropped it. As far as I remember, that bitterness is completely gone in all later interactions we see with Theo. OR! It could be that the bitterness drops because they've both got bigger fish to fry from that point onward, what with Theo's Shilo Incident TM, Emizel's vampirism, the Weylin twins. He doesn't have time to be bitter, he's too busy worrying about losing a cornerstone of his identity or helping his best friend adjust to being a fucking vampire now. And then after he learns to live without soda that basically negates his feelings of inadequacy- like, getting over the idea that he's nothing if he's not the soda guy would be required for him to give up on being the soda guy. And then Emizel would drift back into JUST being a guy to aspire to instead of also being a reminder of Theo's short comings, and then drift even further down into being 'guy who is actually going through it and has to overcome his own demons just like I had to overcome mine'. Like, I think we got to watch Theo slowly start to take Emizel off this pedestal in real time (he still definitely thinks Emizel's hot shit tho. Emizel's his boy, after all.)

Regardless, even if Theo did resent Emizel a little in the beginning, it's so fucking clearly overshadowed by how much he fucking loved him. And like, how could he not? Imagine you're Theo, critically low self esteem, and the literal coolest guy you know fucking LOVES you. Like, Emizel keeps consistently going out of his way to pull Theo up to his level and to treat him as an equal (mostly. Sometimes protectiveness bleeds through, like in his hypothetical fang scenario in ep 1 where he predicts there being five Fangs to fight and he says he can take three and Theo can take two (which in itself is still incredibly kind to Theo. Like, boy, you thought Theo was gonna be able to take out two whole guys? Hell no.) But that could also be chalked up to Emizel just being a cocky ass who wants to show off). Like dude, c'mon. Emizel might be a reminder of everything that Theo's not, but he's also probably Theo's biggest cheerleader. He wholeheartedly thought he was being supportive when he said he thought Theo'd make a great nurse! In all seriousness, though, even if it ultimately discourages him, Theo playing that Smash game against Emizel was at least a little bit of proof of him decidedly not 'staying in his lane,' and Emizel seems to inspire that! Later in that segment he challenges Theo to see which of them can break one of the Fangs kneecaps first! I bet Emizel challenged him to stupid competitions a lot, and that got Theo fired up and competitive in return!

And even when Emizel's not building Theo up, he's still giving Theo special attention, or readily receiving any attention Theo gives him. If nothing else, even at his lowest points that might've made Theo feel cool by association.

On Emizel's part, I think he's like, possibly completely oblivious to any turmoil Theo's going through? Like he thinks Theo's the shit and genuinely sees him as an equal. I'm 99% sure that Theo being his right hand man happened because Theo would've put himself into the role (in episode one before he gets all of his character development he's pretty much always looking to Emizel for what to do, and still more or less does whatever he says up to where I'm at in the series, with refusing to leave the alleyway being the only exception I remember). I think if Theo'd had higher self esteem or been less eager to defer to Emizel, Emizel would've happily gone about his business slotting Theo into more of a partner role. He tells Theo to run from that alleyway because Theo'd taken a fucking devastating hit and Emizel was sure he could handle himself, not because he knows Theo sucks at fighting. He tries to turn Theo into a cool vampire. He convinces Shilo that Theo'll be a valuable asset to raiding the Weylin warehouse and they take Theo with them instead of having him stay behind with the car like Grefgore, despite Theo being the one who actually knows how to drive. He tells Theo about being a vampire even though he keeps it a secret from everyone else, confides in Theo that 'yeah he might absolutely be susceptible to going into a frenzy like Shilo did.'

When you get down to it, Emizel pretty much tells Theo everything he would think is relevant, with two notable exceptions. Maybe three if you count him not telling Theo he has nine lives like a cat but tbh I think he might've just forgot. Or maybe he gets to it later, or maybe he did tell him and I forgot! idk man! But! Those other two things. First off, he like. Pointedly does not tell Theo that he's a prince. Like when they were doing the recap on the way to the Weylin warehouse, there's like. Charlie gives Condi an opening to say it, a little 'is there anything else?' and Emizel just. Doesn't. And the second one is that (at least where I'm at) Emizel never comes clean about bloodbonding Theo. Maybe it just hasn't come up yet, but still. It fits a pattern of Emizel not wanting to admit something that makes him, like, ABOVE Theo somehow. He sees Theo as an equal, and a precious one at that, he doesn't want things to get weird between them because he's literal royalty, and he doesn't want Theo's life to literally revolve around him like it would under a level three blood bond- and doesn't want to admit that he even considered it, even if he did it without really understanding what it was.

And Emizel backing off from ghoulifying Theo after Arthur explains what it actually entails kinda leads into a far more headcanon-y relationship analysis thing so um. Feel free to skip the next paragraph.

So! Like. Why the fuck was Emizel so attached to Theo being Soda. Like he gets over it decently quick, cuz that's his buddy and it's what Theo wants, so like. Whatever. But like, if I'm right about Theo always looking up to Emizel from the moment they met, there might've been some wiggle room between when they first became friends and when Theo became Soda. And like, before Theo became Soda, being Emizel's buddy would probably be the only thing he'd feel he had going for him? Which would've made it even harder for Emizel to get them both on equal footing, and I think that's just... really unappealing to him. Like! Don't get me wrong, I'm sure Emizel loves having people kiss up to him and respect him and blah blah blah, I just think Theo being his boy and Emizel treating him like a partner go hand in hand. Either they weren't best friends yet or Emizel was just. Kind of uncomfortable and eager to push Theo into growing into something more than a hypeman. And then the soda incident occurs, and it gives Theo SOMETHING to define himself by, something people like him and know him for that's got nothing to do with Emizel, and maybe the initial soda incident was bad, but having that sense of identity and falling into what kind've feels like a class clown kinda role might've helped get Theo over his self esteem issues long enough for Emizel to go 'oh you're actually super cool. sweet.' and then blah blah blah they get super close like they are in canon. And then whenever Theo seems like he's backsliding into what he was before the soda incident, Emizel tries to course correct not because he doesn't think Theo's any fun without soda, but because he's made the mental connection that Soda without soda turns into less of a best friend and more of a follower, which as stated before he probably really doesn't want from Theo specifically. but idk. pure conjecture here.

Anyways, above all else, Theo's important to Emizel. I really, really like the idea that Theo was supposed to be like a brother to him (which. Again pointing at my 'Theo was supposed to die in episode 1' theory, can you IMAGINE the angst Emizel could've had about that? Lose one brother and then someone else claiming to be your brother shows up? It would've felt like some hellish, not-worth-it trade. Like a betrayal, like accepting Shilo might mean replacing Theo, and how could he ever?)

And Emizel's important to Theo! But unlike Emizel (who I'm 99% sure is gonna have some kinda moment with Theo but I genuinely cannot see him loving Theo in any other way than the way he does now), Theo has the bonus of having his view of Emizel have a clear trajectory to evolve over the course of the campaign. Like I said, he seems to be getting more confidence in himself and like, not gonna get into the stuff I've had spoiled beyond episode 9 but it seems like Theo's gonna get a lot more comfortable being a proper leader and not just a number two. He's gonna have an easier time seeing Emizel as an equal, and I think that's fucking awesome!

I could be completely off base, but if I never watch another episode then I'll never be proven wrong. So. Ya know.

[sysig]

For the last day of requestober, can you please draw something spooky/scary with Negative RGB? With all the cool lighting stuff you've been doing recently, I think it could be very dramatic, and I'd love to see him in your style!

Day 31 -Pl̷̼͙̯̼̟̈́͒̃̓͆e̵̢͔̞̤̯͗as̴̨͆̒̏e dö̸̧̢̝̳́͝ not̸̨̞͔̗͆̔͝ͅ ̶̦̋͒a̵̪͋̉̈́̒djus̶̪͔͎̘͈̍́̂̅̚t yö̶̙̺͎́͘u̷͚̙̿̓͆r sc̸̙͍͒rę̸̰̺̣̿̓͌̔̎en̴̏̈́͊ͅ

[nemo-me-impune]

Listening to Larry talk about Friends explains why they ended it the way they did but I do think the issue that's occurred is that the reason Friends ended the way it did is because Friends was about people who were inevitably going to get older and get married and have kids and that was always the stated goal

Whereas the whole point of Ghosts is they can't change. They never will change. There is no progression for any of them, including Alison and Mike.

I think it speaks to the class thing I was thinking about before (it's almost impossible to stop being poor after all) but also the difference between the 90 and the 2020s is that none of us are able to progress the way we were told we were supposed to. We can't afford to get married, we can't afford to have children, we can't afford to buy a house and move out of the city.

And Alison and Mik as representatives of our generation get those things, but they don't really do it the way they're supposed to. They're married, but they're very young for a married couple who met when they were still in school. They've got a house in the country, but it's a ridiculous crumbling thing that is never going to be sustainable.

So when they have the baby, the ultimate mark of being an Adult, it feels off to us that they get that without there being talk of finances, about childcare, about support. Anyone who has kids these days only manage it with the help of extended family, and Alison's family can't physically help her (which hits so close to me as the child of disabled parents you don't even know lol) so of course Mike's mum steps in and steps over.

But the resolution should have been leaving the house for the good of the child, for the financial security, the tangible reality of the situation. Not because the Ghosts were lesser in some way than the nuclear family model, which is how it came across to many.

It's like when you put a family member into a care home. Of course you want to be able to care for them and be there for them but reality means they need more help than you can give them, and you need to be able to live your own life outside of being a caretaker.

Alison should not be expected to be a caretaker for eight people and a massive house at the cost of her life and her own desires of a family with Mike. That doesn't mean she doesn't love them, but given the choice she had to prioritise herself. That should have been where the emotional focus was.

I hate to say it's a little out of touch but I honestly think that might be a bit of what's going on here.

Ironically it seems like the ending comes from a place in the past, like pre 2016. Not the distant past but distant enough for us to notice.

[mv1cl16]

Max is SO right. The organizers have confused passion with show. The lasers and dj's create an artificial hype and it feels empty. Being against that is NOT saying you only want 'boring' technical engineering analysis.

We want excitement!!! We want passion!!! But that only comes from having an emotional connection to what is happening. The REAL stories being told on and off track are so much more engaging than what people are boiling it down to.

It's not just about fast cars, excessive money and celebration. It's about the stories!!! It's about the underdogs, the redemption arcs, the villains you end up rooting for, the heroes and their flaws and their journeys, the adrenaline of giant risks and rewards, the team dynamics, the sacrifices, the victories, the pain of giving everything and it not being enough.

There is no artificial hype needed, we just want real passion.

[starcurtain]

I think my very least favorite type of mihoyo fan to interact with is the rabid "There's no ships implied or teased because in Hoyo games no ships are canon!! These characters are just friends!!"

Like, do you just enjoy being bland as untoasted bread? Do you not have a single romantic bone in your body? Are you completely incapable of just letting other people have fun?

Normally I am happy to let people cook, but actually, for this group? Please shut up. Literally no one who is shipping in these fandoms actually expects their ships to be 100% confirmed as canon in-game. We know there aren't many confirmed relationships in Hoyo games. We've got it, thanks!

But denying that there's any deliberate ship tease or fan bait, especially in Hoyo's marketing, just makes you look media illiterate. Of course there's ship tease in Hoyo marketing and games! That shit sells just as well as the waifu/husbando fantasy! Hoyo knows how to make money; they're not stupid!

Anyway, sorry for the rant. There just seems to be a particular breed of really intolerable fan in the Hoyo fandoms that is exhausting to have to see and respond to and that last video has brought them out in force... 😮‍💨

[redysetdare]

Idk i just find it interesting that the conversation of "romance negativity" only ever comes up in regards to romance repulsed people and as a way to try to shut us up and the only evidence that gets brought up for "romance negativity" is actually evidence of misogyny and oppression of women specifically and not really Romance negativity.